


Suspicions

by StellaBGibson



Category: The Fall (TV 2013)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-02
Updated: 2021-01-02
Packaged: 2021-03-12 14:42:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28512090
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StellaBGibson/pseuds/StellaBGibson
Summary: Stella's suspicions are correct
Comments: 2
Kudos: 10





	Suspicions

**Author's Note:**

> I truly have no idea what this is or where it came from. The idea just wouldn't leave me alone so now it's here. This is likely extremely out of character for Stella but I had to get it out of my head.
> 
> Half tempted to just start a collection of these random useless ideas that follow me constantly... anyway, bon appetite

Stella couldn’t help but stare at the photo on the laptop. To anyone else it would look innocent enough. Just a group of friends having drinks. She wasn’t sure if she was overreacting or whether there was substance to her suspicions, but she investigated things for a living, she had good instincts and she trusted her gut. Right now, her gut was screaming at her to call her girlfriend and demand an explanation.

Before she had even registered her own movements, she was holding her phone to her ear, expecting it to ring through to voicemail. Instead the woman on the other end picked up on the third ring. 

_“Hey, Stell. How’s Belfast? Are you okay?”_

The sound of Sophie’s cheery voice only served to intensify the tightening feeling in her chest. She took a deep breath but stopped herself from diving straight into the accusations when she saw movement outside her office.

“Belfast’s fine, Soph. It’s not an easy case.”

_“You sound off, what’s wrong?”_

Stella took another deep breath and stared out into the bullpen where Dani was at a desk doing paperwork. “When were you gonna tell me?” There was silence on the other end, and she wasn’t sure if Sophie was just trying to come up with an excuse of if she was trying to figure out what she was talking about. “About you and Claire?”

The silence on the phone somehow became heavier. She couldn’t even hear Sophie’s breathing anymore. It was only seconds before her girlfriend’s voice met her ears again.

_“It’s not what it looks like, Stell.”_

“Really? Well then tell me where I went wrong.” Once again, she was met with silence. “You can’t, can you? How long?”

_“That doesn’t matter. It means nothing to me, Stella.”_

“You mean I mean nothing to you.” She was surprised to hear the emotion in her own voice and she swallowed a lump in her throat. She took a shaky breath and realised that she had tears rolling down her cheeks. “I’ll have someone pick up my things by the end of the week. I’ll send you my keys too. You can keep the car. If there’s anything left over I’ll pick it up whenever I get back.”

_“Stella, really? I made a mistake. Don’t just walk away without talking about it.”_

“There’s nothing to talk about. When you’re sleeping with her behind my back, you obviously don’t need me anymore.”

_“Stella…”_

“I’m going to go.”

Stella hung up the phone and the surge of emotion took her by surprise. She let her phone fall onto her desk with a clatter as her shoulders slumped and she covered her face with her hands to muffle the sobs.

She heard the footsteps coming before they reached her door and had managed to compose herself for the most part by the time Dani knocked on the doorframe. “Ma’am, I-”

The redhead’s words died on the tip of her tongue when she looked up and saw her boss’ tearstained face. “Has something happened?”

Stella sighed and looked at her phone as it rang for the third time since she’d hung up on Sophie. She looked up at Dani as she declined the call only for it to immediately start ringing again.

“Come in and close the door.” Stella’s voice was husky and it cracked when she spoke. She cleared her throat and turned her eyes to her desk for a moment.

Dani did as she was told and cautiously approached the desk, taking a seat across from the blonde.

“What do you see when you look at this picture?” Stella looked at Dani’s hesitant face. “Be honest.”

Dani looked at the laptop screen and examined the picture. It was of guy and three girls in a bar, all smiling for the camera.

“Two couples on a night out.” Dani answered carefully. “Maybe some very close friends. Why?”

Stella nodded and looked down at her phone as it began vibrating again. “Because the brunette is my girlfriend of six years. And that photo was only taken last night.”

Dani’s heart ached for her boss as she looked over the picture once more, focusing on the brunette. She was on the left side of the booth with a blonde tucked into her side. The brunette had one hand resting on the blonde’s thigh with the other arm draped along the booth behind the blonde, playing with a lock of her hair.

“Have you spoken to her?”

“Just got off the phone. She didn’t deny it. She just said it didn’t matter how long it had been going on. But anyway, what did you need me for?”

~X~

Stella sighed as she made her way out of the station with the rest of the task force. It had been an exceptionally long day and even she had to admit that they all needed a good night of rest. Though she wasn’t sure rest was going to be easy for her, her mind was still reeling from her conversation with Sophie and she had spent all day mentally listing all the people she knew back in London who would be able to help her remove her belongings from their house before she returned from Belfast.

Her eyes were on the ground as she descended the stairs behind Dani and Glen Martin, focusing on putting one heeled foot in front of the other.

“Stella!” The whole group looked up, but Stella froze and her stomach dropped at the familiar voice.

When she looked up, Sophie was standing by a rental car, hands stuffed in her pockets.

“What the fuck are you doing here?”

“You wouldn’t answer my calls.”

“So you stalk me all the way to Belfast?” Stella exclaimed incredulously. “You brought this on yourself, Sophie.”

“It’s hardly stalking when last week you gave me your fucking hotel room number and tried to convince me to take time off work to join you for a weekend.”

Stella cringed at how it sounds to everyone but Dani. “That’s before I found out you were having a fucking affair.”

“It meant nothing! Why can’t you accept that? She meant nothing.” Sophie snapped.

Stella felt her blood boiling and took a few steps towards her now ex-girlfriend. “I don’t _care_ what she meant to you. Because by default, the fact that you fucked her at all, shows that I don’t mean enough to you to stop you from wanting her. The fact that it’s happened more than once shows that I’m clearly not enough for you, end of story!”

There was silence as Stella started to head towards her car, desperate to get back to her hotel room and drown herself in an expensive scotch, away from the prying eyes of her team.

“Why are you so hung up on that? Why are you so bothered? It’s not like you’re ever home!”

Stella froze at the words and snapped around to face Sophie, all thoughts of their witnesses gone. “I’m bothered because I love you! And it fucking kills me to think of you with her. In our house. In our bed. Spending time with our friends. Friends that _I_ introduced you to, who also kept this from me. You knew what my job entailed when we got together, just like I knew yours.” She shook her head with a bitter laugh. “You promised you’d never hurt me. Never leave me. Why the _fuck_ was I stupid enough to believe you meant it? You know how much it took for me to let you in. Go home, Sophie.”

“I love you, Stella.”

“Not enough.”

“Can’t we talk about this?”

“Oh, you want to talk?” Stella laughed dangerously. “Okay, so fucking tell me how long this has been going on!”

Sophie sighed and looked at the ground as she answered. “It started the night after my Aunt Edna’s wedding.”

Stella closed her eyes at the stab of hurt the words produced. “So two weeks after you met. Four years. Fucking fantastic.”

“We can talk about this properly when you get home.”

“I’m not coming home.” Stella replied, her voice barely above a whisper.

Sophie frowned. “What about your things? The car? It’s basically your house!”

“I don’t care.” Stella shrugged with a sad shake of her head. “None of it means anything to me, they’re just things. Sell the car for all I care, move out, move her in. I don’t care.”

“Stella, I’m sorry.”

“You made your own decisions. Nobody forced you. You’re only sorry you got caught. I hope you and your girlfriend are very happy together.”

Sophie watched Stella climb into her car and speed away from the station. She looked up and was met with the disgusted faces of the people she knew worked for Stella. She stood under their hard stares for a few more moments before she climbed back into her own car and left.

Dani looked at the others, still standing on the stairs trying to process what they’d just witnessed. Stella was an incredibly private woman; she rarely spoke about herself or her life and yet her most private business had just been broadcast to almost everyone who worked for her. She sighed, Stella no doubt would be replaying the whole thing all night now.

“Not a word to anyone.” Dani snapped at her colleagues before she made for her own car, fully intending to check on Stella before going home.

~X~

Stella cursed at the knock on the door. She downed the last of her whiskey before she moved to answer the door, bracing herself for another argument with Sophie. Standing on her tiptoes to see through the peephole she was surprised to see Dani in the hallway, looking more than a little uncomfortable.

She swung the door open slowly and couldn’t help the small smirk she gave when Dani seemed surprised to get an answer.

“Sorry to turn up unannounced,” Dani began awkwardly, unsure of whether Stella would welcome her presence or turn her away. “I just wanted to make sure you’re okay.”

Stella felt a minute smile grace her lips as she opened the door wider and nodded for Dani to come in. She closed the door behind the young woman and moved towards the table holding the whine and whiskey.

“Can I get you a drink?” Stella looked over her shoulder as she refilled her own glass. At the nod from Dani she quickly poured another drink before she moved to the couch and motioned for Dani to sit.

Dani thanked the blonde and took a sip, hoping for some liquid courage before she spoke. It wasn’t like she expected or even wanted anything to happen between them tonight, but Stella didn’t often entertain conversation regarding her private life.

“I was half expecting it to be her at the door.” Stella’s voice was quiet and she stared at the floor as she spoke. “I’m glad it was you.”

“I didn’t feel right going home without coming to see you. I didn’t want to overstep but I wanted to make sure you’re alright.” Dani knew she’d already told Stella the reason for her visit, but she didn’t know what else to say. When Stella stayed quiet, she found her voice again. “Stella, we don’t have to talk about this if you don’t want to. It’s a private matter. If you want me to go, I will.”

“No, you can stay. I think I’m still processing how quickly today turned to shit.” Stella admitted. “It was already a bad day, made worse by the confirmation that my relationship is over, topped off with my private life and an exceptionally personal argument being aired out in front of almost the entire task force. Just what I needed.”

“I doubt anyone will say anything.” Dani mused. “They’re all a bit scared of you. You said _fuck_ or some variation of it an awful lot, too, and it wasn’t a particularly long conversation.”

Stella smirked at the thought. “I do lose my filter sometimes.”

“I’m not sure anyone will comment. I may have warned them against it before I came here.”

“Thank you.” She let out another sad sigh, unsure of what to say next.

“If you want to talk I can just listen.” Dani offered. Comfortable silence didn’t bother her but every time the room felt quiet she could almost feel that Stella was bursting for the silence to be filled. “You can tell me about her, or about London. Or if you’d rather, you can listen while I talk, though I don’t have much to talk about.”

“When I asked if you had a man and you told me you’re gay, you never mentioned whether or not you had a girl.” Stella looked up at her with interest in her blue eyes.

Dani sighed. “I did. But not anymore.”

“I’m sorry. What happened? You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”

“It’s okay. She never really liked my job, she got annoyed when my shifts didn’t allow for nights out or weekends spent relaxing or going away somewhere. When I agreed to work with you, it was almost like a switch flipped. Like everything she’d been holding in for the past few years all came to the surface at once. She started avoiding me and a few weeks ago we had an argument, not unlike yours. She eventually admitted that she originally started going out with me because I’m not girly. I don’t wear dressed, I have short hair, I have a masculine profession and I play basketball… She thought it would ease the tension with her parents. She has a boyfriend now.”

“You know it’s not a bad thing that you’re not girly?” Stella offered. “If you’re comfortable in yourself, which it seems to me that you are, then it shouldn’t matter whether you wear jeans or dresses, whether you’re bald or have hair like Rapunzel, your job and your choice of hobby should be things you enjoy doing and you want to do. If someone truly loves you, they’ll love you regardless of all of those things. They’ll love you for you. You should be confident in yourself and your worth.”

Dani gave her a sad smile. She knew the blonde was right but then a thought struck her. “Are you?”

Stella was quiet for a long moment. “Not as much as I would like. My appearance for me is like my armour. The nice shirts and blouses, skirts that accentuate my figure, the tailored trousers, they’re what gives me the confidence when I’m at work. A woman’s appearance is a man’s weakness, it throws them off when she can actually bring something to the table.

“In my own experience… when men like Burns, for example, see me. They first see the woman. The girl who’s only five foot two, has long blonde hair, blue eyes, and a nice figure, who wears tight skirts that show off her backside, heels that make her legs look longer, a shirt that brings attention to her chest. They don’t see the highly educated woman with a number of degrees, they don’t see the woman who juggled her early policing career with university studies, or the police officer who pulled extra shifts whenever she could, worked as hard as she could, got every promotion she put herself forward for, did well in policing exams and has an extensive knowledge of the law, criminal profiling, and forensic psychology. It feels good to remind men that just because I’m a woman who doesn’t try to hide that fact, it doesn’t mean I’m going to sit back, look pretty and leave all the ‘real’ work to them.

“In fact if history is anything to go by, women get more work done more efficiently because they’re better at compartmentalising.” Stella sighed.

Dani was quiet, processing Stella’s words. She hadn’t suspected for a moment that Stella was using her appearance as a shield between herself and the men they worked with. It made sense when she thought about it, but it amazed her all the same.

“I should have known.” Stella’s tone had changed and Dani knew she was talking about Sophie. “I’ve made a career out of investigating and profiling people. I should have seen it coming.”

“We see what we want to when it comes to those we love. Rarely are we able to see the whole picture until it’s too late.”

Stella nodded at Dani’s words. She knew the redhead was right but she was still tearing herself apart at the thought of her girlfriend having an affair for four of their six years together. It wasn’t something she was likely to get over quickly.

**Author's Note:**

> If you made it this far I admire your willingness to see a dumpster fire through to the end, thank you for reading!
> 
> There is a second part to this on my laptop that involves one Dana Scully but I thought that might be pushing it too far


End file.
